Wife In Pain

Dec 30, 2008 by

Father, I feel my husband’s pain. I live with his anger, discouragement, and depression every day. Why is this happening to us, to him, and to me? I feel like a ship out on the open sea in a storm, without a rudder or power to get back to shore. I don’t know what to do except cry out to you, day and night. I’m looking for the answer that you will give. I thank you, Lord, that you are here for me. I don’t always feel you are close. I feel abandoned by my husband, my friends, my church, and even my family. But I know you are here. I know you experienced the feelings of betrayal and rejection during your darkest hour on this earth. You know exactly how I feel at...

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Trimming the Wick

Dec 30, 2008 by

In all the times of aggravation, consternation and head shaking of being a servant of God, a loving wife, a joyful mother, a spiritual leader to other women, young and old, there are times when I have just laid on my bed and cried feeling helpless and discouraged that I just couldn’t measure up to the expectations of all these people! I have felt so small and inconsequential as I reached out to people with encouragement, assistance and a smile knowing that my little bit of help was not really going to make a big difference in their lives. When I was in my twenties I really thought my words had weight but as I grew older I found that most people went ahead and did what they were planning to do despite my...

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The Supportive Wife

Dec 27, 2008 by

Dear Ladies, If your husband is on the brink of the abyss called termination of employment with the church, you are in for a wild ride. Lots of people go through times of unemployment or job change and just work their way through it. There are many government and private organizations which deal with helping the unemployed get back into the work force. However, we have not found many agencies which understand the unique situation in which pastors find themselves when faced with unemployment. Many employers won’t even look at a resume that says a man pastored a church for “x” number of years if other work experience is not listed. It seems the common conclusion is that the man will not stay long but will just find another church. We know that is...

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When Your Husband Quits

Dec 27, 2008 by

This article is designed to help give insight to the wives of male pastors who have burned-out or have been terminated. At Smoldering Wick we do understand and support the many ministry leaders including pastors who are female, but this article is written from a male point of view because that is my personal experience. When your husband announces to the family he is totally burned-out and plans on resigning next Sunday, you and the children are thrown into a life change that has great stress and uncertainty. Even if you were expecting him to make such a decision based on all your conversations over the past many months, the finalization of the decision still has strong emotional repercussions. What will we do now? How long until he has a new job? Will I...

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