http://smolderingwickministries.org/2008/12/why-am-i-being-rejected/ A servant ministry to the hurting church leader and believer Tue, 07 Sep 2010 13:34:42 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.7 hourly 1 http://smolderingwickministries.org/2008/12/why-am-i-being-rejected/comment-page-1/#comment-2029 Christopher Crane Tue, 01 Jun 2010 01:38:27 +0000 http://smolderingwickministries.org/wordpress/?p=200#comment-2029 I'm finding that my disillusionment, and hurt grows exponentially day by day.  I almost wish I had some unforgivable sin I could blame it all upon; some affair, or impropriety.  There was none.  I was faithful.  I did nothing wrong.  I was a target of a group of malicious "Christian" church members in a mainline Pentecostal denomination.  When church members brutally attacked us, and assassinated our character, and when nothing else worked, "starved us out" by withholding their tithes and attendance - rather than standing with us, denominational leadership abandoned us.  I lost a 24 year ministry overnight.  Today, I could care less if I ever walk back in a church building again.  I make myself attend for the sake of my children.  But when they are grown, I am sincerely fearful.  I love God.  His people sicken me at times.  Rather than seeing a glorious church without spot or wrinkle, I'm seeing every wart, wrinkle, and scar.  I fear for myself.  I fear for my future.  Will I ever minister again?  As of right now, no.  But it's bigger than that.  In my current state of mind and heart.  I see myself unchurched within a decade.  And I sincerely won't miss it.  In a desperately difficult economy, God has graciously supplied me with a job, and has provided a place for my family to live.  It's all Him.  My hurt may heal at some moment in the future.  But as of right now, I cannot see my way out of it. I’m finding that my disillusionment, and hurt grows exponentially day by day.  I almost wish I had some unforgivable sin I could blame it all upon; some affair, or impropriety.  There was none.  I was faithful.  I did nothing wrong.  I was a target of a group of malicious “Christian” church members in a mainline Pentecostal denomination.  When church members brutally attacked us, and assassinated our character, and when nothing else worked, “starved us out” by withholding their tithes and attendance - rather than standing with us, denominational leadership abandoned us.  I lost a 24 year ministry overnight.  Today, I could care less if I ever walk back in a church building again.  I make myself attend for the sake of my children.  But when they are grown, I am sincerely fearful.  I love God.  His people sicken me at times.  Rather than seeing a glorious church without spot or wrinkle, I’m seeing every wart, wrinkle, and scar.  I fear for myself.  I fear for my future.  Will I ever minister again?  As of right now, no.  But it’s bigger than that.  In my current state of mind and heart.  I see myself unchurched within a decade.  And I sincerely won’t miss it.  In a desperately difficult economy, God has graciously supplied me with a job, and has provided a place for my family to live.  It’s all Him.  My hurt may heal at some moment in the future.  But as of right now, I cannot see my way out of it.

]]> http://smolderingwickministries.org/2008/12/why-am-i-being-rejected/comment-page-1/#comment-1402 Franklin Banks Thu, 11 Feb 2010 16:33:50 +0000 http://smolderingwickministries.org/wordpress/?p=200#comment-1402   I was not a paster. I was the worship leader.  It was also my job to do the Maint. work onthe biulding and yard. My work was the hardest work of all. Yet I was told that I didn't do(anything).   I was not a paster. I was the worship leader.  It was also my job to do the Maint. work onthe biulding and yard. My work was the hardest work of all. Yet I was told that I didn’t do(anything).

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